Drama with the SD.....part 2

A few weeks ago, I wrote about Tara and Sd getting into it and their "reconciliation" going down the tubes. As the details have emerged, if what I'm hearing is accurate and not exaggerated to make the parties involved sound better - SD really didn't do himself any favors with this last go round with the kids. Tara left there telling stories about him growing pot at his cousins house. Keeping 2 oz of pot in his freezer at all times. According to her , and she is not the most reliable of sources, he keeps more marijuana in his house than food. He also supposedly keeps bottles of pills that he sells of which he goes to multiple doctors for. The also live in the bottom half of a duplex and they keep the kids in the top half. According to Tara, there is no working plumbing in the top half of the house either and they lock the kids in at night. She said that the little 18 m old boy they have, fell down the stairs twice while she was there. She also wanted me to do something about it. However, I fully intend to stay way out of it. There are 2 reasons for this. The first being - I wasn't there. I have no idea what really goes on in that house. And the 2nd is- I really don't care. Maybe I should. But I don't. It's none of my business. If she's so darn worried about it, then she should do something about it.

I was sitting at Vix's house when we went back over the 4th. I was on my trusty laptop talking to Tara on yahoo. I try to keep contact with her to a minimum still. I just can't bring myself to trust her. And I'm sure that y'all understand why. Anyhow, Little Man and B were being their normal nosy selves and reading my conversation while making typical teenage boy nasty comments. Little Man took it upon himself to ask Tara for SD's phone number. Well, her response was "if it's alright with mom". Now, mom who knew that he didn't want the phone number for any good reason, was about to type no when I was ambushed. Little Man held my left arm down and B held my right arm down and then between the two of them, they typed that mom said it was ok. Yes, they are still alive. I didn't beat, batter, or abuse them although as you can see, they plainly need it. So, Tara, who is madly kissing tail at this point she's so happy that her brothers have spoken to her, gives them the number. AFTER the rotten hoodlums get it in Little Man's phone, they run off laughing to give it to Hurricane while I'm trying to explain to Tara that this was probably a big mistake. That no good can come of giving that number to Little Man. There are just too many hard feelings there and he will probably try to throw a party when SD goes to prison this year. Side note: his pre-trial conference has been moved to September. His trial is set for October. So, giving the evil 17 year old the number to the SD that he wants to madly torture was not good. And he took it to his even more evil 21 year old brother. Up next....

What evil children can do with a phone number to a person that they're really no happy with...

Sorry, I've been so bad about posting. We are still having trouble with the movers. It has been 5 weeks and they have still not completed the job. I spent today checking out our legal options. We have grounds to take him to small claims court if damages are under 10 grand. I have to start getting estimates to see what it's going to cost to get things fixed. Please, for your own sake...Never. Ever. Ever. do business with Wayne Gilliland or All State Specialty Contracting. On top of all the problems we've had inside the house, we had our pool stolen Weds night. I went to take my niece home and while we were gone, someone pulled up in the yard and stole the pool. This wouldn't have been so easily accomplished if one of 2 scenarios were true. The pool had been set up already which we couldn't do because we had to wait for the tree work to be done first (my ex brother in law is coming tomorrow to do the most dangerous trees) or if our shed were here like we paid to have here. See, if the shed were here - the pool would have been locked in the shed. But no, we're STILL waiting on the All State Specialty Contracting to fulfill the terms of the contract that he has already collected money for. Well, I just managed to depress myself again so I'm off here. More on evil children and SD next....

Happy Birthday Little Man!

One of my hospital pix of the sweet baby

Little Man on the 4th of July

Little Man with our old neighbor girl on the 4th of July

Today is Little Man's 17th birthday. Where did the time go. It wasn't that long ago that I was in labor. And then sending him off to his first day of pre-school. Eye surgery, glasses, first dentist appointment, learning to swim, running him to the ER when the little girl next door ran him over with her bike which had no handlebar grips. Running Ice Cube to the ER when he tried to steal food off Little Mans plate and Little Man promptly stabbed him in the head with a fork and left the fork hanging out. There went a few stitches. His first "date" to homecoming and winter formal. Learning to drive (now there was a scary time). When did my cute little chubby cheeked bald baby turn into a big mouthed, back talking, voice changing teenager? And what can I do to turn the time back to when they were all little and cute again? Just kidding there. It's been a long road to travel with these guys. This makes year 11 that he hasn't received so much as a birthday card from SD. I don't think he even notices anymore. No, that's not fair. I'm sure he notices. I just think that they don't expect to get one so they're not surprised when it doesn't come.

He's pretty upset today that none of his friends made the trip to see him. It's only a 2 hour drive. It's not thru any bad areas. It's a straight shot down the highway. I am not surprised. I didn't think that they would. He ran with a whole group of kids, but they're teens. And with teens it's a case of: out of sight - out of mind. I'll be so glad when school starts down here and the boys start making new friends. And all the new girls to check out. Every time we go to the store or fast food, the boys are looking to see if there are any "hot" girls. Yes, I know. Disrespectful and rude. I can only smack them in public so many times before someone gets upset about it. None of my boys have ever been disrespectful with anyone that they have ever dated before though. They may talk smack between themselves but that's as far as it goes. Lucky for them right?

Well, we're watching the Angels whip the Yankees again. It's funny. Yesterday on the mlb message boards, there was an article up about Tori Hunter and Vlad going on the DL (disabled list). So many Yankee fans were posting about what an easy series this was going to be with 2 of the Angels best players on the DL. The Yankee fans were posting that it was going to be an automatic sweep. They were so obnoxious about it all. And they spoke too soon. Because the Angels came back to win 10-6 last night and they're up 10-7 in the 8th today. Now, I'm of 2 minds about all this. The Yankees losing is good for my Red Sox in the American League East. It increases their lead going into the all-star break. But, now, I really need the Angels to lose a few games when the Rangers win so that the Rangers increase their lead in the American League West.

Well, off to watch the baseball scores. I have had my 11 year old niece here since last Weds. We were supposed to trade her out for her 8 year old sister today but I just got a call from the dad and something came up. They need to leave her here for another night. This is absolutely fine with me. Apparently, it's not fine for the 8 year old who has been packed and ready to come for the past 2 days but it's totally fine with me. Little Man is not so happy as he was really wanting them to come by for his birthday. I'm going to go make him a cake and see if I can make his mood any better at all. Have a good weekend!

home again

yesterday's text picture from Ice Cube.....

We are home. We got here Weds. Hurricane was most unhappy with me over not staying longer when I went back thru. But I had the day from hell driving home. First off, I got about 80 miles out of Austin and my car was acting funny so I stopped to try topping the tank off and I didn't have my debit card. Ice Cube and B had gone to get food the night before and I never got my card back. Well, I had enough cash on me to take care of that issue so I called Ice Cube and told him to stick my card in the mail. About 25 miles later, I blew a tire. Now not having a debit card becomes a major pain in the tail. What's a bigger pain in the tail is that there was not a tire store open for the rest of the drive home. And I can't drive 55. I can't do it. Well, obviously I can because I did but I hate it! And then, I got 10 miles from Vix's house and my check engine light came on. So, my 2 1/2 hour drive home took over 4 hours to make. I got the tire fixed the next morning and took the car in and got a read out on the check engine light. I tried the number one thing that it could be. Obviously, that wasn't it because the light is still on. And it's still running rough. But it's still running and I'll figure it out soon.

To those folks who have asked what baby's bloggy name will be.... I have no idea. I'm open to suggestions. As he hasn't developed his own nick name or personality yet, so I have no idea what to name him here.

Ruth's dad is giving the kids a boatload of headaches. He decided one day that he was going to cut off the car insurance. Then he put them back on it. Then he decided that he would leave Ruth on and take Ice Cube off. Which since Ice Cube is paying for the insurance and the car- they told him that makes no sense. Then he cut Ruth off his cell phone plan. So, Ice Cube called me to see if I could add her to my plan. Of course. She can't be alone at the apartment with a baby and no phone. And at the time her dad pulled that one - she was still pregnant. And there is a 3 hour span between Ice Cube leaving for work and her mom getting home. No matter how you look at it, it was bad news. Then he threatened to come take the car they're driving. When I was there, he had Ice Cube "grounded" from driving the car for a week. He's such a fool, he doesn't think about who's paying for the car and who is working. And when they offered to give him the car back - he sure doesn't want that. He can't afford that car. For whatever reason, he seems to think that he should still be running their lives. That they should ask how high when he tells them to jump. What he's accomplishing is to push them away. He has to understand that no one was jumping up and down for joy when Ruth got pregnant. Having my son tied down to a baby at 18 and trying to support a family was not part of my dreams for his future. And there are some legal issues with her family that don't make it them the inlaws of dreams. Nightmares actually would better describe them. Her dad's side of the family is about like SD's.

My Little Mans birthday is tomorrow. I'm waiting to see how many kids are making the drive from old city to new city. Meanwhile, I had better get back to preparations in case we do get a houseful. Hope everyone is well. I've been doing good at reading all my friend's blogs. I haven't done so well at leaving comments. My apologies!

Take care all!

He's here............

He has arrived



with both Grandmas. His other grandma is a labor and delivery nurse and got to do the actual delivery....




With mom and dad



Being held by Grandma

Uncle B holding him for the first time while doting daddy makes sure he's doing it right


6 pounds 1 oz. Born at 1:23 PM on the 5th. 20 1/2 inches long and 2 weeks early....

I barely made it in time but I did make it in time for the birth.

Heading back to the hospital now to spend more time with him before I have to head home....

Happy 4th!

Well, no baby yet. Ruth is miserable. She has been having contractions every 4 minutes since Monday. They have had minimal sleep. They could do the labor induction today - but today is SD's birthday. And Ice Cube did not want his son born on SD's birthday. For some reason, Tia, keeps thinking the baby will come today. This is something that we're hoping doesn't happen. Ice Cube really doesn't want his son to share a birthday with someone that he has so many hard feelings about like he does SD. I think that if that happened, it would cause more problems. SD would try to use it to claim a connection that he doesn't and won't have with the baby. Ice Cube is adamant that he does not want SD to even see a picture of his son. Now, I'm not sure how we're going to avoid that, but whatever he wants, we'll try to respect his wishes. This, of course, means that Tara will not be given a picture of her new nephew.

We have been staying at Vix's house. They do not have a big house. 2 bedrooms. Hurricane lives here so he has one room. Little Man and B have been camping out in his room. I have been sleeping on the couch. I will say that Hurricane offered me his bed. I turned him down. I can sleep thru most any noise that is not kid related. If I hear a door open in the middle of the night, I'm up like a shot. If I hear a window open on the opposite end of the house. I can process their conversations that they think to have while I'm asleep. But Cal blaring the TV till 4 am - I can sleep thru. Cal on the PS3 till 4 am - I can tune out. And with Cal's MS - his schedule is all messed up. He tends to sleep away the heat of the TX day and then be up at night when it's cooler. This means that we're trying to be quiet all day long so he can sleep. Then he gets out of bed at 9 PM and wants to go all night and not let anyone else sleep. B is not happy. I finally got him to start crawling in bed with his brother where it's not as noisy and he could get some decent rest before he ends up sick. Vix and I are at opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to cleaning house too. And don't get me wrong - my house is by no means ever spotless. I have never owned a new piece of furniture. Most of my wall decorations are pictures of my kids. But, I vacuum every day. My dishes stay done. My laundry is clean if not always put away promptly. You're not going to walk into my house and get eaten by a 3 year old dust bunny. Vix and I cleaned her desk off the other night. I kid you not, I was throwing away coupons that expired in 2007. Now, I might put something in a drawer and not find it for 6 months to a year before I clean that drawer out again. But, not on a counter or my desk. But then, Vix says I'm anal because I put my cans in the cupboards all together. How else are you supposed to know how many cans of corn or peas you have? We're just as opposite as night and day. She has pet rats - we have a ferret. She does cats (which I cannot do! Having a cat climb on my counters just bugs the daylights out of me!). I have dogs. She sleeps till 2 pm every day. My internal alarm goes off around 7 and it does not matter what time I went to bed the night before - or the morning of as the case may be. She is laundry helpless ( I've done no less than 10 loads of clothes since I've been here) - don't let me loose with any type of electrical saw I'm prone to chopping my fingers off (she builds beautiful wooden furniture). And yet, this woman has been my best friend for 30 years. Now, if I can only drag her out of the bed and house today to actually DO something for the 4th.

Have a happy 4th y'all! I will continue the sage of what happened when Hurricane called SD later. I will let you know that the boys escaped unscathed - they were mostly amused by it all and the emotional damage from the attempt to make contact seems minimal to none. Enjoy your fireworks, bar-b-ques or vacation plans!

drama with the SD .... part 1

Tara went back home from SD's house. They did not end things in the best way. Sd punched her bf in the face. Tara got into it with SD's girlfriend. Tara told me that SD's girlfriend was an idiot. Just sits around with an idiot look on her face. The 2 of them (Tara and gf) about got into a few disagreements. They are apparently a physical bunch. Me? I'm glad to be 1000 miles away from all the drama. Once Tara got back to their place in "another northern state", things went from bad to worse between her and her dad. SD didn't answer or return her phone calls for days. He finally called her back and she made arrangements with him to go get her stuff and her dog. She was most worried about her dog and for good reason. When she got there, despite knowing that she was coming, he wasn't even there. His girlfriend was and they had another difference of opinion. Tara says she left without even bothering to tell the girlfriend goodbye. I think that out of common courtesy, she should have said something. Once they got the dog home, Tara had another go round with SD over the dog. Something about the dog cringing whenever anyone goes near him and him not wanting to play anymore.

Tara has emailed me upset by everything she went thru while she stayed with SD. I'm afraid that my return email wasn't as sympathetic as she might have wished for. I told her that she was old enough when we divorced to remember what life with SD was like. Everything she complained about were things that he did back when she was a kid and lived with him. She tried to tell me (via email) that she hadn't remembered. She was pretty shocked by the amount of drugs that he's still pushing out of the house and in front of the kids that live there. He keeps no less than 2 oz of marijuana in the freezer she says. He goes to multiple doctors for pain pills and sells those. There is more marijuana in the freezer than food. The kids are neglected and filthy. They smoke marijuana with the 2 older girls who are 14 and 16. None of this surprised me. I don't know why it surprised her. For all of you who are dealing with crazy, psycho ex's and worried that the kids will never see thru the BS - Trust me. The time will come. For years, I have been dirt on the bottom of the dogs feet in Tara's eyes. Nothing I have ever done in life was right in her eyes. Nothing. I was the worst parent. I ruined her life - ask her. I was too strict, too involved with the boys, etc... She would call her boyfriends mom "mom" and then call me Amy just to be a smart ass. Just to be hurtful. 2 weeks with SD is all it took. I am "the best mom in the world". She is texting me and emailing me telling me how much she loves me constantly now. Of course, in the world of bi-polarness, all of this could and probably will change in the blink of an eye. But, I'll take the emotional kudo's that are coming right now. It always makes for a good mommy feeling when they actually appreciate anything you ever do.

Of course, being the good sister she is (read with all sarcasm intended) she decided to share SD's phone number with her brothers. She knew that they didn't want it just to call and say "howdy". UGH. There are days that you just wish you had stayed in bed. I'm sure every parent out there knows what I mean. But, no, she gave the number to Little Man and B who of course took it straight to Hurricane.

Next up: Hurricane's phone call to SD and more hatred spewed from the crazy sister.....

PS: Ruth has been having contractions since Monday. If she has not had the baby by Sunday, they are going to induce on Sunday morning at 5. I will be leaving old town for Austin Sunday morning to be there for the birth (or shortly thereafter) of my grandbaby. Happy 4th of July all!

Monday notes

Good Monday morning! We're settling in nicely here. The boys still aren't thrilled with being here, but they're not actively complaining as much either. They're finding alternative means of entertainment. And we're going back to old town to stay with Cal and Vix for several days next week so they're happy about that. Actually, Little Man will probably stay for a week or so. They're talking about doing a labor induction with Ruth on the 13th of next month. We should hear something else when she goes to the Dr. this week. If so, I'll be going to Austin for that. B will most likely come with me and Little Man wants to stay and hang with his friends for his birthday. He'll be 17 next month. I might leave him there for a week or so. I'm not really sure. He wants to stay with Tom and I'm just not into that idea. Tom uses Little Man. The day before we left, Tom and his gf stopped by. They didn't come to say good bye. They didn't come to visit with Little Man. They wanted Little Man to go do something for him. Well, at that point and time, we were knee deep in loading the truck to leave. Little Man told them that he was busy at that point. They didn't offer to help. They didn't stay and chat. They didn't bother to say good bye. They just left. And Little Man commented on it at the time.

Now, myself, I'm the type of parent that knows that I taught my kids right from wrong and I'm there when they want me or need me. But with some of this stuff - I don't even want to be involved. B is friends with a little boy that he's played ball with since they were 5. Great kid. Nice parents. The dad coached B's team for years. But the mom is right up in every bit of the kids business. He gets in a fight with another kid- mom is on the phone calling the other kids mom. And none of it is ever her child's fault. None. Of. It. Just ask her. That poor child is the most over-scheduled child I've ever seen. The poor kid never has time to just ... be a kid.

Yesterday they showed up and started putting my ramp together. The owner, Wayne, was very apologetic. I think it's a great case of him covering his tail. He did take a walk thru the house. He did agree that a lot of the damage could have been avoided. He's supposedly sending a drywall man out here next week to fix it all. My ramp is usable. The steps still aren't attached to it yet but that's ok. He's going to have to put some lag bolts in it instead of screws though because it's not holding together right. His guy that took the ramp apart tore it up. He's done an admirable job putting it back together but screws aren't going to cut it. Not with the weight of the chairs.

So, moving 190 miles from one town to another hasn't stopped the influx of extra kids. We ran back to old town yesterday and picked up a couple of young ladies. These girls are friends of Little Man. The one young lady has been friends with him since they were 6. She keeps telling me that she's moving in with us as soon as she convinces her parents. I'm thinking that she's never going to get away with that but in the meantime, I'm sure we'll see a bit of her. We took a short walk thru the woods last night. The girls loved it. Stopped at Vix's house while I was in town and got all my freezer stuff from her freezer. We also dropped off a box of Ice Cube's clothes so that I didn't have that extra stuff to deal with when we go down for the 4th. I am going to try to get all of my boys together for pictures while we are in town. Either with a photographer we know or in for professional portraits. With or without the girls. We're leaving Weds to go back thru the weekend. Ice Cube and Ruth are coming in from Austin too. I can't wait!

I'm sure this will be the last time I see Ice Cube and Ruth before the baby comes. They have talked about doing a labor induction on her around the 13th. We'll know more on Weds when she goes back to the Dr. Well, I'm going to close off here before another storm rolls thru. The satellite internet goes out faster than satellite tv when storms come.