I found the thorns ... part 2

I didn't hear anything about the write up from the school for a week. So, in my ignorance and foolishness, I figured that the school had caught the mistake and taken care of the situation. Until Monday when I got a call from the vice principal telling me that Little Man had been suspended for a week. Yep, a week's suspension. So, I talked to the counselor, talked to the vice principal, talked to the principal, and talked to the administrator. His suspension was due to start on Tues. I asked for a delay of punishment until the matter could be investigated. I spoke to them about the modifications, I spoke to them about the medical records and issues. I tried every legal route. I even cited the specific codes that said that punishing a child on the 504 for a migraine caused by failure to follow the 504 was against the law.

The response by the egomaniac vice principal: "If you don't like our rules, take your child out of my school and teach him yourself. Insubordination is insubordination and there is no excuse, if he had a migraine and the teacher told him to do the work then that's the way we do it here. If you don't like it- pull him out and take him some place else. "

The response from the principal: If this is what Mr. X has decided, then I'm not going to change the punishment.

The response from admin: I trust my administrators. They said that he was insubordinate and there is no excuse.

I called the state: They sympathized but 504 is a federal program. Call the federal office of discrimination in dallas.

I called the federal department in charge of 504. They told me that I could file a complaint but that it would take a "while" to do the investigation and that he would have to go thru the punishment until then. They told me that I did have a valid complaint and that the school would definitely be in violation if their investigation found that he was on a valid 504 and the insubordination was from telling the teacher he didn't feel well but that didn't fix the immediate problem.

I called back to the school who got even ruder with me and told me that "apparently I had a problem with authority" and I was welcome to pull my child out if I didn't care for their rules.

This was all between Monday and Tuesday. Tuesday morning, I sent Little Man to school to start his first day of in-school suspension. He went to the ISS room, they gave him his "busy work" which had absolutely nothing to do with the classes he's in. Oh, and the vice principal told me that they don't do out of school suspension, because then the state doesn't count the child there. (In other words - they don't get to collect the money from the state so they don't send them home) So they basically shove them in a room and tell them to read the dictionary for 8 hours. Plus give them an 11 page packet to fill out every day with questions on it like: why are you in ISS. What could you have done to change your behavior. Little Man's answers? I'm here for getting a headache I could have thrown up on the teacher. By 11 AM Tuesday morning, I had to pick B up to go see the orthopedic on his broken wrist. I picked up Little Man too. At this point, I was seriously considering taking him and using the state approved home school program and sending him to the local college for a class or two. He only had a few classes left for graduation this year anyhow. So, I took both boys out of school and headed for the orthopedic. Little Man tells me - well, you took me out of school so the time I did today doesn't count, I have a whole another day to do now. So, I asked him. What work did they have for you to do. His response was the info about the packet and the dictionary. I wanted to know about if kids who had been in there longer had class work. No. Same old garbage. Then he tells me that the ISS teacher yelled at him for having the dictionary too close to his face trying to read it and told him she would write him up for being too close to the book. Ok. I'm done.

When we got home, I had him check the home school program that I used for both of his brothers. I wanted to see if they provided books and curriculum for the advanced classes that he is in. (Neither of his brothers took anything more than basic classes). They did. I also wanted to see if they were accredited - they are. Weds morning, I got the paperwork for him to take his ACT's that the college requires. Then I called the counselor and requested his official transcripts. Today I will pull him out officially although they already know that this is my intention as I stated such to the counselor. The counselor is the only one that has shown any common sense in this whole issue. She got me his ACT packet yesterday and his official transcripts. She also wanted to know what I was going to do about B. At this point, B is still enrolled in the school. But, I don't know how long that will last. It's only going to take one little incident and that will be the end of that too. I really expect that they will try to retaliate for what happened with Little Man against B.

So, there's the end of my daily peace and quiet time. I actually went to college for education. Got all the way to my student teaching class and dropped out. Yeah, I know. I had "better" things to do back then. I started driving truck and traveling the country. Not real smart from this side of the coin but what's done is done. At least I know that I'm not totally unqualified to do what I'm taking on. And that thankfully, Cal has a masters in computer science so if I get into too much trouble with the pre-cal class, he's only a video conference away. Plus the school supplying the books and tests that we'll use has a 24 hour tutoring center accessible by email, phone, or webcam. So, we'll be good. His english and history classes I'm not worried about. He's already completed his foreign language credits. It's only the math that really concerns me. The government and economics, I've already taught to the older boys and tutored several of my "strays" thru so we're all good there. Wish me luck folks!

In other news, NK (the new kid) moved in with his girlfriend yesterday. This is probably not the smartest thing he's ever done. First of all, they've only been dating a few months. Not to mention the vehicle he drives has a radiator leak, a starter that freezes up and desperately needs replaced, and a transmission that is in such bad shape, he can't go over 50. And the girlfriend lives about 13 miles further from the school than I do. Oh and he's driving on an expired license and no inspection. Should we mention that his job is in this town and not the town she lives in either? Or that he only make $55/week working and his truck will eat that in about 3 days? However, those are my opinions. I'm sure he wasn't thinking with his brain and I wished him well as he packed his stuff. I did tell him that once he left, that was it. This was not a hotel to come and go as he pleased. He was very sweet and appreciative of all that I had done for him but he really wants to go live with girlfriend. I think this might be the end of their relationship but hey- what do I know? Have a good day all!

I found the thorns

Gotta love little schools. Little Man's class had a sub all week last week. Due to confidentiality issues, the sub is not given the 504 modifications. The regular teachers are supposed to leave all the work ready for the kids. This did not happen. What also didn't happen was the sub getting informed that there were modifications. Or that Little Man has migraines resulting from the issues or anything. So, the sub puts a movie on and plays it up on a brick wall. It's all nice and blurry. Then there is a 20 question test over the movie handed out. This is not blown up to the appropriate fonts or double spaced so that he can differentiate between the lines. Background here: Although the boys issue is considered a "vision" issue, and although Little Man is legally blind in one eye (as in can't see the top line - big E- of the eye chart in that bad eye) what the issues really is is a processing issue. The right eye sees one thing, the left eye sees something else, the 2 images instead of becoming one their brains are so vastly different that the brain can't make sense out of them. In Little Man's case, this causes severe, throwing up, can't open his eyes, migraines. Part of the modifications he has is the ability to rest his eyes between assignments. This prevents him from over-working the eyes/brain and keeps him from getting migraines. Now, he's had these modifications since 1st grade. This has always been a part of his schooling. And the modifications were put in place so that he could stay in his advanced placement classes with all the reading and work that they involve without suffering from daily migraines. The rules behind this for the 10 years we've had the modifications in place have been that he cannot abuse this privilege and that unless it was really an emergency, he had to finish all his work first. This has never been an issue for a kid who pulls straight A's without any effort or studying.

Back to the issue at hand. With the sub they had last week, once he finished his movie and test, he had a whopper of a migraine starting. He was feeling like he was going to throw up. So, he did like he had always done and been allowed to do. He put his head down on his desk and tried to relax and rest his eyes. This class was 6th period so he knew he could make it thru the last 2 periods. Well, the substitute told him that he needed to get going on a word search. For one, there was no grade to the word search. It was busy work because the class had finished the test so quickly. For 2 - you don't give a kid who sees jumbles of letters anyhow, one with no depth perception or peripheral vision, a jumble of letters and ask them to find words. He's already fighting to make sense out of real words. So, he told the teacher he wasn't feeling well. That he thought he might throw up. So, the sub wrote him up for insubordination. Now, I imagine that he should have explained the 504 to the sub. That he should have told her about the migraines and the modifications instead of just saying he didn't feel well. But, this was how they had always handled it in the past. So that the whole class didn't get a lesson on the condition and embarrass the boys.

Well, I didn't worry too much about the referral. I knew that the modifications were on file and any effort at all to check into it would show that due to the sub not being fully informed of the circumstances, there was a simple mix-up. Yeah. Right. See how wrong I was. Stay tuned to find out how wonderful my first 2 days of the week went and why I am now thoroughly unimpressed with the new school's administration and all things related to the power hungry fool that is otherwise known as the male chauvinistic vice principal and administrator they have.

and so it begins....

I was feeling better about the boys going to a new school yesterday. Little Man had made friends with a young man the first day and was pretty excited about the whole thing. He likes all of his teachers at this point. He has seen some "good looking" young ladies and he and B had a nice discussion at the end of their first day as to the availability and looks of the girls at the new school. The "hotest" young lady was apparently some young lady in pink cowgirl boots that both boys thought she was just "it". Both boys had come home from school talking about the Mac books that the school is going to give out this year to every kid in the high school. Both boys found this to be extremely cool. Little Man was telling about his computer teacher and he talking about how he was going to have to show her how the mac books worked because she is not familiar with the macs and he's had his own for 3 years now and we've owned one here at the house for over 9 years now. B was not so overly excited but this is nothing unusual for him. He had no valid complaints about either the school or the students just his normal complaints about "school sucks". Yippee and who cares. Yes, I am a bad mother because I really don't care if he likes it or not. School is school and it's the law. He is required to show his happy tail in class until he graduates or turns 18. And he had better hope that he doesn't turn 18 and drop out because that would not be a healthy decision for him to make.

Day 2 of school seemed to be going even better. The boys went to bed at a decent hour the night before. Schedules seemed to be switching easily. They were sent off to school with the $5 needed to get a parking permit (the old school was $20). Cal was up very early (for them) yesterday morning and told me that he had ordered B his high school computer. I texted B so he would get the message during lunch and this was something that would make him happy. B actually had something good to say about the school because they give out "2 pieces of pizza" and they're "pretty good size too" for lunch here and not just the 1 that they got at old school. (Yes - ok- so it's a food related compliment. When it comes to that kid and school, I'll take anything I can get) I got a text from Little Man asking if they could go get pizza with someone after school. I jumped at the chance of that because that meant that they were making friends and friends mean - no more complaining. Little Man's girlfriend that he's had for a while but has only seen once since school let out really upset him and in itself, this is also good because then maybe he'll stop pining to go back "home" and give this a chance to be home.

I was on my facebook playing one of the games that they have on there. Yes, ok... all comments about my addictions to a certain farm game on the stupid facebook can wait. My cell phone rang and it was the athletic coach of the school. He wanted to let me know that B had been doing agility exercises during athletics and while running a drill, had tripped and fallen. The school thought that he might have sprained his wrist and they wanted to let me know so I didn't just have an injured child walking in the door. He asked if I wanted to let B ride home with Little Man or did I want to go get him or have them take him to a Dr.? Being the kind, caring type mom that I am - I told them to just send him home with his brother. I was thinking - fell, sprained wrist, yeah right - school over-reacting. I could ignore the whole thing, B would go out for pizza with Little Man and new friends and by the time he got home, the whole thing would be done. Can anyone say "wishful thinking"? Imagine my surprise (as I sat there in the clothes I had been painting in earlier playing on my computer) when Little Man and B walked in with one of their friends. The picture is not pretty my friends. I had been finishing Little Man's desk up earlier. I had on the clothes that I use to paint in and no bra. I was not expecting my kids let alone an extra at that point. So, as the boys walked in, I asked (like the good, concerned parent that I am) ... "What are you doing here? I thought y'all were going out for pizza." No applause necessary folks. Little Man informs me that they couldn't go because of B's hand. At this point, I actually unglue my eyes from my farm game and B is sitting in the chair holding his right wrist in his left hand. It's got an ice pack on it held there with an ace wrap and the child is in obvious pain. Now, remember, this is a child who tore his rotator cuff, finished the game with a torn rotator cuff, had surgery, and just came off 8 months of physical therapy with never a complaint of pain. This child has been in a baseball game, gotten his fingernail on his pitching hand ripped off by the ball, we've stuck it back on and he went in to pitch the next game of the double header with the injury. So, he is not one to complain about pain and the pain he was in was visible on his face as I could see he was trying desperately not to cry. Mind you folks, we just moved here. We don't have a Dr. here yet. I don't know where there's any type of hospital or emergency care center. I know that the nearest places have to be in Texarkana which is 30 miles away. So, while B is trying to keep control of himself, I'm on the phone to the 800 number of the insurance company, trying to figure out where I'm supposed to go. And calling an 800 number with folks in Austin, does you absolutely no good when you're in a small hick town, more than 300 miles away. Just for future reference folks. It doesn't do any good at all! Tim's friend ends up calling his mom who, bless her wonderful heart, gave me directions to the best hospital (read - quickest ER) in Texarkana.

After a more than 30 minute drive, we found the hospital and things moved rapidly from there. Ok, well, moved rapidly after we got into triage at least. We arrived at the hospital at 4:50. The waiting room was filled with people who mostly looked like they had no business wasting the time of the folks in the ER. Sorry folks- tangent coming. Pet peeve here folks- if your child is well enough to throw water bottles at his brother in the waiting room, he's well enough to wait to go to your family Dr. If you can carry a fast food bag with the hand that is supposedly hurt so bad you're holding it with your other hand- you're faking. Go try to feed your drug addiction some other place. And for goodness sakes young men- I do not care to see your underwear as you hold up your baggy jeans with one hand while walking and stuffing vending machine food in your face with the other. If you can manage all that, then you're well enough to not be there. And if you have to go the the ER, is there a reason that you bring 3 small children with you as well as the sick one? Do we all need to be exposed to your cold germs while your ill behaved kids run screaming thru the waiting room? And gotta love the lady with the pink and white flowered pants and the non-matching red shirt with her bra straps showing and the 1/2 dozen tattoos. Sexy there folks. Can anyone tell that I am not a fan of emergency rooms at the best of times? So, we sat there waiting to triage for over 30 minutes with me telling B to not touch anything and try to not to breathe while he's at it. Finally, I went and asked for an ice pack. The lady said that the triage nurse didn't want to give me one until they looked at his wrist. You should have seen her face when I told her that I really needed an ice pack to cover up the fact that the bone was coming thru the wrist and if I didn't cover it, I was going to throw up because it was making my tummy churn. 5 minutes later, we were finally in triage and things moved rapidly forward from there.

We were sent to the "fast track" waiting area straight from triage instead of back into the waiting area we had been in. This waiting room was empty (imagine that) and I started thinking that maybe these folks did have a clue. From there, within 5 minutes a nurse came to get us and we were taken to a room. The 1st nurse that came in after that was a fairly rude young man. He had quite the attitude and acted like we were there on a whim or something. I suppose, after what I had seen in the 1st waiting room, his attitude was understandable but he really was irritating. He said that xray would be coming for B shortly. Ok- knew that one was coming so no biggie. The Dr. arrived before xray and I started to worry a bit when she mentioned calling in an orthopedic before ever getting xrays done. The xray folks arrived really quickly after the Dr. left and took B. Next to arrive was a nice nurse man who wanted to know when was the last time B had eaten or drank anything. This is not what you want to hear when you go to the ER for a possibly broken bone. Those are questions they ask before anesthesia folks. B had been food free since 11:30 that morning. He had had some water on his way in to the hospital and that's what we informed them. We were told that he was to not have anything else from that point forward, that there was a significant break of both bones, and that the orthopedic surgeon was on his way in. I asked to see the xray and knew immediately that we were looking at a probable surgery. The radius and ulna were both broken at the growth plate. The radius was where the ulna should be and the space that is supposed to be between the arm bones and the hand bones was gone. The ulna wasn't attached at all and was just sort of sticking off to the side (the bone we could see trying to poke thru the skin). My questions from there on were along the lines of .... do you think this will require pins? Does this type of surgery require an over-night stay? Will he ever be able to throw again? And mixed in with those was a healthy dose of - No, B! You may not walk out of here before the surgeon arrives. And it will be fine. You have to get it fixed.

Within the hour, the surgical team was assembled, I had signed my life away in paperwork, I had spoken to the anesthesia folks and the surgeon, and he was in surgery. 15 minutes and out. No pins. They had to put him to sleep to set the break. He is in a cast from his fingers to almost his shoulder. The Dr. said he had to put the cast on very tightly to keep it as immobile as possible. The fact that it's on the growth plate was not of concern to the orthopedic as B's growth plate was almost sealed anyhow. He will be in the cast for about 9 weeks. This may give him some leeway in school as it's on his writing hand. The athletic director and the coach drove to Arkansas to the hospital last night to check on him. They got there as we were being discharged. We were out of there by 9. That's including the surgery and recovery time folks. I give kudos to the hospital for being that quick. Our longest wait was for the triage nurse to see him. I also give kudos to the coach and the athletic director for making the drive to the hospital. Our old school, the athletic director wouldn't have even known who B was or that he was at the hospital, let alone given me his cell number and called to check on him. The coach said that B was very calm when he walked up to tell him he was hurt. B apparently said "Coach I fell and I think I broke my wrist". I also thank both Little Man's new friend and his mom who went above and beyond what you would expect from someone you just met. New friend even stayed here last night with mom's permission. He and Little Man are gone to school. B is still sleeping on a mattress on the family room floor. I was up till 4 and back up at 6 this morning. Despite my lack of rest, I feel fine. I would love to post a picture of B and the cast but I don't see it happening. He's not overly fond of pictures at the best of times and this isn't the best of times. Tomorrow will be back to school for him. I'm off here to get on the phone, to find a primary care physician before something else happens. Please note: We have lived here about 2 months. I don't know where the mall is but I now know where the hospital is and have an orthopedic surgeon. The important things in life right?

Y'all have a great day!

They're gone....

Today is the first day of school for Little Man and B. They are nervous. Beyond nervous might be a better way to put it. They moved from a 5A school in the metroplex with class sizes ranging from 25-35 kids. Little Man had a over 800 kids in his sophomore class last year. Now, they are in a 1A school that doesn't have 200 kids in the whole high school with an average class size of 12-15 kids. They've already taken most of the electives offered with the exception of the FFA (future farmers of america) classes. The counselor wasn't quite sure what to do with them when I enrolled them. The 5A district they came from had programs that offered things like starting your high school credits in 8th grade. So, things that the counselor is usually signing her freshman up for like the computer class that's state mandated and that B has already taken for high school credit. Little Man did his credits for Alg 1 and Spanish 1 in 8th grade. B has already had his speech and health credits as well as his 1st computer credit. Little Man is upset because the only elective that they offered for 6th block that he hadn't already taken was "intro to horticulture". He is in physics and pre-calculus and those are classes that are only offered one period a day as opposed to every period of the day at his old school. At the old school, there were 6 principals and 8 counselors. Here there is a vice principal, a principal, and 1 counselor. Can y'all say culture shock?

Now, while I'm so very glad to have them back in school because the "I'm bored" and "this place sucks" got old weeks ago. I'm so very worried that my city boys won't fit in. I really have faith that once they make new friends, they will be more comfortable here and not drive me quite so batty. And for all of you ladies who believe that I'm sane and level headed - it's all an illusion. All these years of raising teenagers had made me healthily nuts. I just seem normal. But after dealing with the illogical logic spouted by male teens on a regular basis, my mind does not work like a normal adult mind. The problem with associating mostly with male teenagers on a regular basis is that they start to actually make sense. Scary isn't it? Ok, so they don't actually make actual "sense" all the time, but I can at least follow the path of logic that they take. So, the grumping and grouching coming out of the boys mouths for the last few months, while irritating at one level, was understandable on another. B was especially hard to handle because he's hitting puberty and that level of being annoying as well as his fear of starting a new school. Little Man, being the self-absorbed 17 year old that he is, thought that (of course) this is hardest for him as he should be starting his Jr. year with all his friends. But, at least, he would talk about it. B never said much, he just grumped, grouched, and grumbled about everything but what was bothering him. But, I know my child and his irrational fear of change so I was able to (mostly at least) ignore him.

But, now they're back at school and I am enjoying the peace and quiet. Plus, I can get my house cleaned and get to the painting in B's room that has been put off by the young men spending a majority of their time in there. Did I mention getting my house cleaned? The joy of being able to mop the kitchen floor without having a size 10 cowboy boot walk across it 3 minutes later? Not having to listen to the words "I'm hungry" or "there's nothing to eat here" 746 times a day. Don't get me wrong, y'all know how much I love my kids. Y'all know how much I enjoy having them all around and having a houseful of kids. It keeps me young (at heart at least). And the feelings of freedom and peace that I'm enjoying right now, will disappear with the headaches of dragging unwilling teens out of bed before 7 every morning and homework issues. I'll be eagerly awaiting weekends and school breaks. But, for today- after not having a break from the boys for the last 3 months.... it's like lying on a beach in the caribbean with a tall drink.

Well, I have already gotten a text from Little Man. Apparently, things are not as "horrible" as was feared on his end at least. He tells me that they all get a mac book to take with them from class to class and to bring home for the year. That's quite cool in his eyes. In answer to my question of how things are going? I got back "yea its all good". I would assume that since the lunch room is a separate building shared by the elementary, jr high, and high schools that the boys will have lunch together. I have the feeling that as new families around here are not an every day occurrence, that the girls around here might be fairly interested in 2 new boys joining the neighborhood.

Y'all have a great day! I'm going to go be a woman of leisure. Hey, I can pretend can't I?