People are insane and other random thoughts

Weather change again folks. For those of you who may be new - this is is not a good thing for an old bat with bad joints. So, I am taking a break from getting ready to leave in the morning to prop my legs up and watch my addiction (better known as Dancing with the Stars). Its the finale. But my American Idol starts in January. : )

On an update, Mr. Bad Influence and I came to a meeting of the minds the last few days. I called him out on a few things. He found out who the boss was. He remembered who he was dealing with. And he settled down. No more rude comments. No more messing up and not cleaning up behind himself. And .... The big apology. Yes, folks. He apologized. As with most young folks that age, there was something else bothering him. A few things actually. For one, his dad is moving in with his girlfriend. They are talking about getting married. And the relationship between child and future step-mom is not starting off on a good foot. Now, I would bet money that part of this is because the boys can have an attitude. However, the mom to be is mandating things like boys dog must go. She's taking the other dogs that the dad has. But his collie has to be gone by the end of the week. There are some other things going on that are more private in nature but boy is resentful because boy's best friend is being kicked out. I may be bringing the collie back here to live with us. I'm doing the big debate about it right now. Dogs are easier to deal with than kids. Other issue that boy has been dealing with is that his dad got laid off. So, there is some worry about money now. Now, I told boy that this did not at all excuse his poor behavior. So, its not like I let him off the hook. But, we have come to a better understanding. And I have reestablished that I am the boss. Little Man still has some punishment coming for his mouth and attitude. He is in no way off the hook. And he will probably be unhappy with me for several days yet to come.

One of the blogs I follow, Lifein3dee, has been having a problem with stalkers. First, the crazy ex-wife managed to find her blog and she has not only been stalked by the crazy EW but other assorted members of that family. Now, the crazy EW has given her blog address to a woman known by the nickname "white trash barbie" on the blog. WTB (white trash barbie) and the ex (cruella) have been corresponding to try and keep our blog friend and her hubby from seeing his children. Cruella picked up the 12 year old for visitation and has never returned the child. As I am a new reader, I am still going back thru the archives to play catch up on the history here. Check her blog out folks. Not only can she use the support that I have found to be so wonderful in my corner of blog land, her blog is well written and I really enjoy it. And I'll be honest folks. What these two women are doing to Lifein3dee really sets my temper off. Not that it takes much to set off the red head here folks. But seriously. White trash barbie is deliberately creating lies and going against her own husband (who is the 12 year olds grandfather) to try and help cruella alienate the children from their dad. I think it irritates me so much because WTB reminds me so much of SD's crazy family. Who cares if the kids get hurt right? So long as you can push everyone that was in your spouses life out the door and have them all to yourself then screw the consequences to the innocents right? I am so very sick of immature adults hurting kids just because they're so paranoid and insecure that they don't care who they hurt. For over 10 years now, my kids have had to do without a dad. Was he the best dad? No. Was he a good role model? Hell no. But was he the only dad they had? Yes. And they had to deal with an insecure, selfish child masquerading as a woman who wouldn't pass messages to their dad and lied to child support to keep money that should have been paid to the kids in her pockets. She sabotaged what little relationship that the kids had with SD - no matter how poor it may have been - she sabotaged it down to non-existent. And white trash barbie and cruella are trying to do the same thing to lifein3dee and her hubby. So, they've been not only stalking lifein3dee but possibly the people who comment on her blog. If they happen to have shown up here and possibly might be reading this...

Grow up folks. Get a life. Karma will come back to get you. The damage that you're doing to family relationships, the damage that you've done between a dad and his child shows your level of immaturity and selfishness. What goes around - comes around. And when your time comes around, I will sit here in my little part of blog land, enjoy reading about your down fall and then enjoy passing along your story to the next fool who is so insecure that they would rather sabotage a parent/child relationship than allow a child to have the parental love that should be theirs. And that time will come. Just as the people who sabotaged my children's relationship with SD have been bitten by Karma. Just as SD is paying the karma price. Anyone who has followed my blog for any length of time knows just how hard SD has had it in recent years. Not caused by anything I've done. I just seriously believe that you cannot continue to lie and cheat and steal (and yes, lying to keep a dad and child apart is still a lie, cheating a child out of a decent relationship with a parent is still cheating, and stealing a child from their parent or a parent from their child to fill your own selfish needs is still theft) and not having to pay for those things in some way. Eventually, you will have to pay.

Think about it folks.

God bless all the moms (be they bio or step) out there in blog land who are trying to do this thing right and do what's best for the children involved!

the lesson I learned

I've mentioned Vix and Cal.  They are my bestest friends and the kids god-parents.  I have called Vix my "sister" for more years than I care to admit.  She and Cal are still so much in love.  Cal has MS.  Multiple Sclerosis. It's a rotten, horrid, awful disease that's eating his body little by little.  Vix takes extraordinary care of Cal.  Cal had acute onset MS.  He was in the military and doing some sort of exercises.  He got into a tank in southern TX heat.  He came out with MS.  MS is aggravated by heat.  The heat causes flair ups.  Now, if you think living in TX is not the best idea for Cal - rest assured that he is quite comfortable in the AC.  Vix is very careful with making sure that their house stays acceptably cool for him.  And the new house that's being designed is specially designed for staying comfortable.  They're building a dome house.  Most dome houses stay at around 72-75 degrees without using either heat or air.  At least the type they're building.  

Cal is much healthier than many people with his type of MS.  We are so very careful to not expose him to anything. A simple cold bug is dangerous to people with MS (like many other diseases).  I'd explain the whys of all this but I'm not that technical.  I will say that I believe the reason Cal is still doing as well as he does is because of the care that they take with his health.  And although the disease has done nasty things to his body- Cal has a brilliant mind. He's a MAC developer and some program he wrote is standard issue on all MAC computers now.  (like I said- I'm not a technical minded person).  

As well as Cal is doing considering his medical issues.  Helping him - I hate to say "taking care of him" - is a time consuming process.  He needs help getting in and out of bed.  There are days that he can't get out of bed.  Someone has to cook for him and make his plate.  He's at the point now where fine motor control is a struggle so he even needs help cutting up his food.  He needs help getting to the bathroom, getting his clothes, Vix gets him his medicine, makes him whatever he's hungry for, he has special drinks that need fixed- you name it and she does it.  And when he's have a bad day or a bad week - what suffers is the other stuff she has to do like housework.  And with the trip to Vegas- well, you know who had to do all the packing.  

So today, my friend and I went over there and cleaned house for her.  We did it as a special something for her.  Because she's always taking care of him.  (Cal does spoil her financially though and is very loving to her so you could say that he spoils her in his own way).  But my friend, who took care of their cats while they've been in Vegas, thought that this would be a nice thing to do for Vix.  Cal had been not very well before they went to Vegas and the house was in need of some tender, loving care.  My friend is a much nicer, caring person than I am and she comes up with these great ideas.  So, we went over and did a thorough clean on her kitchen for her.  We wiped down the cabinets, moved everything and did the floor, and totally bleached down her counters.  We also stripped down their bed, washed the sheets and remade it and ran the vacuum in the house.  We wanted to get to the bathrooms too but we ran out of time.  I did several loads of laundry while I was there and folded the laundry that she had in the dryer.  I say thank you to Mrs. JJ for coming up with the idea.  Thank you for reminding me that my sister is carrying a burden that I don't always recognize.  That as much as she loves Cal and as much as I don't see Cal as "disabled"- there IS a lot to taking care of someone with the medical issues that he has.  Mrs. JJ compared it to having a very large toddler.  Having known Cal for so long- I didn't see the "disability".  I see the person he is.  And I need to remember that Vix who is such an important person to me- does have those extra things to deal with when I go by there and the dishes aren't loaded.  I need to just pitch in and do them for her instead of just thinking that they need done.  

There's the lesson my friend taught me.  Sometimes we know people so well 0r don't know them well enough that we miss the things going on in their lives and don't even try to understand why things are the way they are.  We just judge.  I don't want to be like that.  I want to run with this lesson Mrs. JJ taught me and be a better person.  One that steps up and helps- not one that judges.  

Now, off to watch American Idol because like my blog friend, Kou - I'm addicted.  Sorry Kou!  Not meaning that in a bad way but I do love to watch that show and I know you do too.